Oliver Benjamin
started?”
Sprout nodded and he assembled his men in front of the
building. They collectively reached for their breast pockets.
“Good idea,” Colin said. “We blow out the windows. It’ll make it
easier to storm the building.” But to his disappointment they were
not packing heat. They were packing Hebrew.
Suddenly a holy ruckus erupted, with the Hasdids chanting
scripture and swaying back and forth like a marionette theater
administered by drunks.
“What the hell…?” Heck said.
“They’re praying for the return of Solomon’s temple,” Bard said.
“I once did a piece on them in Jerusalem. I don’t know why they’re
doing that here, though.”
Sprout was in earshot and explained, “Biddenbrooks is
destroying little coffee temples all over the country. Biddenbrooks is
Babylon. It’s a greedy empire, oppressing the outsider.”
Bard replied, “Sexy! Hey Bobby, get some footage of that,
willya?”
Bobby filmed the Hasids. He captured the amalgamated army
chanting and marching in front of the building. He taped Alex Bard
interviewing Sprout. Colin tried to do a few cartwheels so that he
could get on camera as well, but he kept landing on his ass. Finally,
at the end, just as they were wrapping up, Izzy came over and
announced that he had something to say.
Bobby pointed his camera at him.
“Okay, sure. What is it?” asked the reporter.
“You’re just as bad as they are.” he said, “You’re also a
manipulative drug-pushing parasite.”
He walked away in a huff. Bard clapped his hands together. “Okie
dokie. That’s a wrap. Great stuff. Really great stuff.”
“Should I erase that last bit?” asked Bobby.
“Of course. Fucking little prick.”
267
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