Oliver Benjamin
coming here together, but I thought nothing of it at the time.
God knew what she expected to accomplish by finding me—
money, personal slavery, marriage—I didn’t know. My main concern
was that I didn’t want anyone I knew to find me—particularly anyone
who could spill the beans about my condition. Samrin island was no
longer a safe place for me to hide out. In fact, it seemed as if the
whole land mass was sinking into the sea. Clearly this was no longer
the place for me to find whatever I was looking for.
At this point I was willing to go anywhere. With Tree’s apparent
escape, and the entire island’s supply of recreational drugs dumped
in the ocean, there was nothing left for me here anyway.
Afraid to go back to my bungalow, I went to visit the friendly
neighborhood Juddhist temple. Stumbling inside, I came upon Oscar
packing up his things.
“Oz!”
“Jake! I’ve been trying to find you all day! Listen my good man,
I’m leaving. I’m off to learn how to become a better guru! I figure
you’re pretty happy on Samrin and all, so you won’t be coming with
me, but let me just say that I’ve had a great time here and I have only
you to thank for it.” He put down his bags and came over to give me
a friendly handshake.
“Actually, I’m leaving too.”
“What? Really? Where are you going?”
“I don’t know yet.”
“Well come with me then.”
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to a spiritual Disneyland, where everything and
anything can happen. One of my disciples told me about it. You can
meditate or learn to paint or do stupid new age rituals, and as for me,
I can take classes on how to be a more effective spiritual leader!
Perfect, huh? I’m sure there’s something in there for you. I hear the
girls are easy.”
“Interesting. So what’s this place called?”
“The Omniraja Commune Incorporated.”
“Where’s that?”
“The subcontinent,” he replied.
“The subcontinent? What’s that, Atlantis?”
“No Jake, but it’s a place that’s nearly as inhospitable for air-
breathers.” He then mustered his best booming game show host
voice and bellowed, “Beautiful downtown Bombay, India!”
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