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Uhh…Sssghhall.” I had no clue at all.
“Jenny Hughes,” she chirped.
“Jenny Hughes,” I said a fraction of a second later as if I had
known all along. “How are you, Jenny?”
“Greaaat! I just graduated and my daddy is sending me around
the world, sort of like for an education or something.”
Or something. “Lucky you,” I said.
“Yeah, I really think I’ve learned a lot. I was just in Turkey for a
month. Did you know that a lot of the Arab families still practice
female circumcision, where a woman gets her entire external
genitalia cut off? Isn’t that wild? Israel was pretty bizarre as well. I
found out that Hasidic Jews can only have sex with their wives if they
put a sheet over them and cut a hole in it! The kinkiest thing I’ve
heard of so far is that in some parts of New Guinea young boys are
supposed to go down on the older men as a rite of passage? I can’t
wait to see that.”
Now I remembered. Jenny Hughes. The girl who appeared in
the school paper for petitioning for a new major: Sexual Studies. The
girl who then did the bulk of her research for that major in the private
rooms of every fraternity on campus. Jenny Hughes, the erotic living
legend was sitting behind me on a flight to Thailand. How apropos.
“You look different Jenny.”
“Yeah,” she gnawed violently at her gum, “Part of my graduation
present was a nose job and a boob job. Personally, I would have liked
the nose even smaller and the boobs even bigger, but doctors never
listen. It’s like when you get a haircut,” She laughed.
“Uh-huh.” I guessed this wasn’t the first time Jenny had been
under the knife, “You look really good,” I said. She got up and moved
to the seat next to me.
“Really? Thaaaaanks” she squeaked through her new nose. Her
synthetic boobs nodded in agreement, “So are you still together with
that really smart girl, umm…”
“Charly Witherspoon?”
She thought for a second, “Yeah, her.”
“No.”
“Awwww.” she brushed her hand on my arm, “Are you…sad?
“No,” I lied, “And you? Weren’t you going out with that guy in
Student Government, uh Bill Bryant?”
“Oh, yeah, but we broke up. I’ve seen Chuck Green, Jeff
Hutchence and Frank Duffy since Billy. But then I broke up with
BIG AMERICAN BREAKFAST
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