Oliver Benjamin
the man who served us came to our table and handed us our bill. It
was for fifty dollars.
“What?” I spit out a mouthful of beer, “This was supposed to be
a free show!”
“Yes, this is for beer.”
“Twenty five dollars for a bottle of shitty beer?” I whined. We’d
been had.
“You pay or I break your friend’s leg,” he answered robotically.
I assumed that mine was a standard reaction and his, the obligatory
rebuttal. Oscar shook his head helplessly.
When we got outside I turned to Oscar and barked, “Good one.
It wasn’t even good beer.”
“The show wasn’t bad,” he offered, trying to make petroleum
jelly out of petroleum. “So we fucked up. It was a learning experience.
I’ve done far stupider things on my travels.” I believed him. He
continued, “Anyway, I’m hot. Let’s get some of the real thing.”
We strolled a few yards and entered a large, well-lit, and
generally respectable-looking brothel by the name of “Siam Sandy’s
Niteclub and Body Massage Parlour” Girls dressed only in dental
floss danced acrobatically on stage, and for the third time that night
we sat down and ordered drinks. I checked and double-checked the
price before ordering. When two girls came over to our table, Oscar
turned quickly to me.
“Let me handle this. I’ll make up that for that last blunder,” he
said, turning to the girls. “We want a special price for two sex-
massages. We pay fifty US dollars total. Okay?”
They looked briefly at each other and then started conferring in
Thai.
“OK, Joe. But you pay first,” one of them said.
“No. We pay half now and half later,” Oscar insisted, the master
negotiator.
They agreed, eyeing our wallets in the same way we examined
their flesh. They both wore identical little dresses boasting
unbelievably low cuts down the front and equally high cuts up the
sides. They were the sexiest outfits I’d ever seen in my life and I was
overwhelmed by the desire to destroy them.
We followed them upstairs, and were led to separate rooms.
Oscar was so overtaken by lust that he was unable to wish me good
luck or good-bye or anything else, but he did manage a gleeful grunt
in my direction as he was led into his room.
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